THOUGHT OF THE DAY — PENSAMENTO DO DIA

September 19, 2012

NURTURE YOUR “POOSIE” AS A BEAUTIFUL GARDEN.
GET RID OF THE WEEDS AND REVEAL YOUR TULIPS

CUIDE DE SUA “PERERECA” COMO SE ELA FOSSE UM JARDIM.
LIVRE-SE DO CAPIM E MOSTRE SUAS TULIPAS


From the Mouths of Husbands

August 16, 2010

Priorities—

Paul:  Honey, working on our budget I noticed that you’ve been spending too much money.
Maryland:  Sorry honey,  I’ll cancel my appointment with Reny tomorrow…
Paul:  Stop right there.  We are not that poor.  Let’s get our priorities straight  …

Food of Life—

Rachel calls her husband Gerorge from Whole Foods, and when she tells him where she is he goes ballistic. “Honey, didn’t we talk about saving money last night?  What are you doing at Whole Foods?”  She replies, “Ooops, You are right, I’ll go to the Grocery Outlet.”

That same night getting ready to go to bed, Rachel looks down to her pubic area.   Honey, I think I would like to try the Brazilian wax, but I know we are low on funds”  Without hesitation, George  declares: How much do you need?  $100,  $200?


Still Vibrating

February 5, 2010

A similar story to Beware of Small Vibrators was the talk of a party I went to last week.  The laughter we shared was all bout “teaser” vibrators.  The women seemed intrigued about the use of such small toys and were worried about making sure the apparatuses did not get lost in the excitement.  So, everyone had a good laugh when my African American client Tanesha told us that “Jammal,” her big, huge black vibrator will never get lost and instead makes her sing like Mariah.


Beware of Small Vibrators

December 8, 2009

Since my studio is located away from the street, I don’t usually get walk-ins.

Last week I was surprised woman started frantically knocking at my door.  When I opened it she said, “I need an emergency wax.  Now!”  I felt a little uneasy when she refused to fill out the information sheet or to even give me her name. Yet, she explained she was in a hurry to go see her doctor and she looked panicked.

Once on my table, she explained she wanted all the hair removed from her pubic area.

Hello Kitty

Looking at her vast jungle I wondered why she decided to get waxed now, why the hurry and, what was the reason for such secrecy.  But, as you all know by now, the stories from my waxing room emerge in the most interesting of ways.  So, I trusted the process and began my work.

I tried to carry on small talk but she seemed anxious and didn’t care for what I had to say.  Nearing the end of the procedure she declared she never cared for shaving, much less waxing.  Of course, this was my opportunity to find out what in the world was going on.

She told me she did something so stupid and was very embarrassed by it.

And, before I could form a question, she blurted out “I HAVE A SMALL VIBRATOR STILL VIBRATING INSIDE OF ME SINCE LAST NIGHT.  I DID NOT WANT TO GO SEE THE DOCTOR IN MY HAIRY CONDITION.” Needless to say, my decade of listening to waxing stories was very useful as I kept my cool and did my best to listen with care.  The client then placed my hand over her lower abdomen and low and behold, there was something alive inside of her.  Wow.

When I was finished with the waxing, she paid and left as quickly as she arrived. I stood at my office door a bit in awe of the experience and wondering how many people get to be part of such private and personally embarrassing moments.  And, what brand of battery she used because her belly was still vibrating – on high.


Threatening Words

November 3, 2009

Quote
—CARLY

Sweet and sour.  My client’s threatening words to me while I performed the Boyzilian on her husband last week.

Cheers,

Reny

Let there always be laughter.
And absolutely no hair.


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